I just wrote the crappiest first draft* that I believe I have ever written, which is upsetting enough, but I handed it in as an assignment, which is humiliating. This is for a workshop class. Everyone was really kind in their comments, which at first I thought was encouraging, but then when I heard how kind they were about someone else’s draft that was incomprehensible, I got nervous. Now I’m convinced that mine was almost as bad. It was comprehensible, but being so, it was easier for a reader to tell that it was an awful essay. The only thing it had going for it was my writing style, which made it easy to read (if not understand). If I ever get it cleaned up (which I have to do for a decent grade, God help me), I might put it up here, but I doubt it. It will be too long, for one thing. It’ll have to be because of all the weaknesses I have to strengthen by expanding a comment here, creating a “scene” there. (The kind that brings vitality to one’s writing, not that which I feel like doing).
Off to the writing board. Gulp.
*I owe this to Anne Lamott in her book Bird by Bird, only she was more vivid in her description. She has saved my sanity by writing, “Everyone should write a [crappy] first draft.” Well, I’ve certainly done that.